If Challenge Master numero uno had her way, this is how I would look all week. Yep, her final challenge to me was to wear all my clothes inside out. It actually might have worked out well two weeks ago, when my laundry was accumulating in massive "clothes-drifts" in the corners of my room and I didn't have anything clean left to wear. That ketchup stain on the jeans is easily hidden when turned inside out.As embarrassing as it might be to walk around looking like I got dressed in the dark, the second challenge was much worse. It was more of a competitive challenge, let's say. Me against the clock. Challenge Master #2 wanted to see if I could eat 53 of my own boogers in under 30 seconds (she tends to have the humor of a six-year-old at times). First of all, to think that I might have 53 little guys up there seems a bit of an insult to my hygiene (of course I was just considering wearing dirty laundry, hmm). Secondly, 30 seconds is pretty quick. Ever tried to eat six saltines in 60 seconds? Impossible I tell you, impossible. No way could I go under 30. Besides, Dustin Hoffman has resolved to give up nose picking. Maybe that would be a better challenge. Although some people do feel that nose picking is the cleanest and safest way to clear out your nostrils.
So the last challenge has got to be it right?
Yes, well public humiliation and ridicule really do not appeal to me. "Break into song on a crowded bus on your way to class. Encourage others to join." That was the last challenge. Umm, I put Mariah Carey to shame in the shower, I am better than Kelly Clarkson in my car, and there is no doubt in my mind that Aretha could have taken a few pointers in belting out the soul from me. Unfortunately everyone around me hears what I actually sound like, not the pristine voice I hear in my head. I really think the world would be better off left sans musical performance from this girl.
But wait! Does that mean no challenge? Well it is my final week, so I am putting the challenge quest out there to poll everyone and find out what YOU want me to do!
